Steve Shipman Photography

Luton Hoo Hotel and Spa, the luxury wedding venue in Bedfordshire, is one of my favourite places to photograph weddings, and I am thrilled to be one of their preferred suppliers. Marje Ednie is the Wedding Coordinator at Luton Hoo, and it is my pleasure to present this Big Day Small Talk interview with the bubbly and delightful Marje.

Marje Ednie at Luton Hoo

Tell me a little bit about yourself – where are you from?

I’m from Scotland, just outside Edinburgh, so I’m a Fifer, and I’ve been down here for 27  years. I have two children, they are 24 and 21, both have left now and have homes of their own but they do come back and raid the fridge. I’m now on my own and loving it….

I’ve been here at Luton Hoo for about four years, I started six months after it opened, although there were still hard hat areas especially at Warren Weir. I previously worked for the Ramada chain, based in Hatfield, and started there as a receptionist. By chance one day I was asked to fill in for someone In the conference & event office and loved it. Six months later wedding bookings were picking up and I was asked if I’d like to be a wedding coordinator  – OMG yes please!  That was 15 years ago and I haven’t looked back.

Are you in the middle of a project now?
I’m in the middle of moving house – it’s driving me mad! I was about to complete on a house last October when the seller pulled out, so I was left in between houses, as I’d sold my own already. Rented a house, tried to buy it, that fell through, so I’m still renting. I have another on the go – so hopefully this one will go through. I hadn’t realised it was so stressful – the most stressful thing I’ve ever done. And expensive!

What do you love about your job?
I just love it! The one to one, seeing it from the start right through to the end, I just love it. I’m a romantic at heart, and I’d rather sit and speak with someone than talk on the phone. I’m not a good phone person. [you're a good emailer though!]

What do you feel is the most challenging thing about being a wedding co-ordinator?
Keeping calm. There are a lot of bridezillas out there, and I think you need to keep them calm and let them know that you’re here to help them – you’re on their side. If you’re stressed, then they’re stressed. Let’s work together.

What do you think are the trends this year?
Wedding dresses are getting bigger. I think floaty vintage dresses look good here at Luton Hoo.

Do you think that’s a reaction to the recession – ‘Stuff it I’m going to have a big dress despite everything?’
No, I think people have an initial idea of what they’d like, try something on that doesn’t suit them, then see a big dress and go Wow, I’m going to have this! Trouble is, I’m not sure that brides get the right advice when they buy their dresses.

What has been your most memorable booking and why?
All of them! They are all amazing!

What do you think of the wedding industry at the moment and where do you see it in 5 years from now?
This year has picked up a lot. It was very slow last year. In five years time I think people will be going abroad more. They are killing two birds with one stone, wedding and honeymoon, and their guests are with them. I can see that happening more and more.

What was your most embarrassing moment?
I haven’t really had any, although once I was invited to one of my brides evening parties. When I arrived the buffet was being laid out and I’d got it wrong. It was a Jewish occasion, and they’d served bacon in the Croque Monsieur instead of mushrooms! My instructions hadn’t got through, and I felt terrible. The couple were fine about it, it was just one of those things.

A website and/or blog you like?
I don’t have enough time to do blogs, although I’m always looking at web sites – I like The Wedding Planner, and I’ll often pass on information to my brides from there.

What talent would you most like to have?
Oooh – I love to be able to sew – I’m very envious of people who can make nice dresses. That, and singing and dancing. The only time I think I can sing is on the Karaoke, and that’s after a couple of glasses of wine! I love ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ and ‘Dancing on Ice’ – love it!

If you were having fun, what would you be doing?
I’d be out with my girlfriends having fun. We recently started doing the hotels in London, every six weeks or so we’ll go to a different hotel. Last week we went to the Grosvenor House, we absolutely loved it there. The Landmark was nice, and next time we’re going to the Millennium Hotel.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My children.

Something that is overrated?
Valentines Day

Your favourite film of all time?
Oh, I’m a soppy bird so I love all the romantic ones – ‘The Bodyguard’ with Whitney Houston, and ‘Pretty Woman’ with Julia Roberts

A book you’ve enjoyed recently?
I’m such a nosey person, so I love biographies. I’m reading Adele’s at the moment [Adele's biog is out already??] My favourite? I love other people’s business, that’s what it is. I just pick up whatever catches my eye. I also enjoyed Arabella Weir’s ‘Does My Bum Look Big In This?’ and I love the Babylon books – Wedding Babylon by Imogen Edwards-Jones especially.

What ambition have you yet to achieve?
I’ve yet to achieve scuba diving because I’m scared of deep water. My friend took me on a glass bottomed boat just to give me a feel for it – it really freaked me out! I tried a snorkel when I swam with dolphins, but I didn’t like this whole thing around my face – it takes a lot of getting used to.

What would you say has been the main key to your success in your business?
Just being me.

What advice do you have for anyone wanting to become professional and do what you do?
You have to have the patience of a saint, and be interested in your clients. You have to like the profession, you’ve got to have the passion, and you’ve got to do your research.

Three tips for brides?
Be calm, don’t be a bridezilla, it’s not worth it – you’ll want to happily remember your day.
Enjoy yourself.
And book a group breakfast the next day because then you can reflect on the day before with your friends. You’ll not have seen everything that goes on, and your friends will love telling you all the stories.

What is your most treasured possession?
My mum’s engagement and wedding rings, which I wear.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Sitting on a sun-kissed beach! I love my holidays – they’re really important to me. On cruises we stop off at different places and you can spend the day on the beach.

What would your superpower be?
I’d love to be a fly on the wall! It’s my nosey streak!

What is the best piece of advice you have been given?
My general manager at Ramada always said ‘Just be you’, so I did.

Your favourite indulgence?
Champagne!

If you weren’t doing this, what would you be doing?
Two things – I did once want to be a midwife, and now I would like to work in a funeral parlour. It’s from when my dad died, we went to get the funeral sorted and everybody was so hard – you don’t need to be hard about it. You need to have that little bit of compassion, and I think I could do that. I love ‘Call The Midwife’ on television! Miranda  Hart is wonderful in it!

Tea or coffee?
Coffee

Cat or dog?
Neither, I’m not really an animal person.

Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now?
Hopefully retired, if the big lottery win comes in I’d definitely retire. If not, I’m happy where I am. I’ll keep doing this, it’s a lovely job. I love making everybody feel at home here, it’s like being in your own front room.

If you had one wish…
Health and happiness, that all you need, nothing else.

Thank you, Marje, it was a pleasure to chat with you.
Thank you! I enjoyed that actually!

MEdnie@elitehotels.co.uk

http://www.elitehotels.co.uk/lutonhoo

Today’s Big Day Small Talk is with Chef Phil Thompson, Head Chef at The Auberge du Lac, the Michelin starred restaurant on the Brocket Hall Estate in Hertfordshire. You’ll see as you read that Phil laughs [a lot] hence the brackets.

Hi Phil, thank you so much for giving me this opportunity to talk to you.

Tell us a little bit about yourself – where are you from?

I am the fourth child, born in Dagenham, and my dad worked at Fords. [My dad worked there too - I was born just up the road in East Ham] I left there when I was 19 or 20 to move to London. All my family are chefs – I used to wash up pots in my uncle’s restaurant, they gradually taught me how to blanch tomatoes, and things like that.  My mum was a cook in the canteens at Fords, my Nan used to run the canteens, my sister used to work there, so it’s inbred, in the blood! [Laughs]

Are you in the middle of a project now?

It’s The Auberge and Brocket Hall – they take over your life! I run the three kitchens on the estate, and it’s always seeing how far I can push myself, and push the boys in the kitchen. Every day is different [So it's an on-going project?] Yes, that’s right.

How long have you been in the business?

Phew! I’m trying to think how old I am now – 17 years

What do you love about your job?

I love the banter with the boys – I come in the morning and we do all the prep together – I do all the butchery and fish prep in the mornings, and at 33 I’m the old one in the kitchen! They’re all 19, 20, 21. It’s the atmosphere – if I take a couple of days off – I’ve just had a week, first time in years, – I miss it, the banter, the atmosphere. The adrenalin rush, the buzz you’d get from a service is wicked – it’s what you’d spend all day in the kitchen for – 18 hours to get that buzz.

There are many aspects to the job I love – I get up in the morning and I come through the beautiful estate to get here. I don’t think there are many people who can say that. I have three sisters, one of them works in a bank and she hates it, works 9-5 and she hates getting up in the morning and going to work. I don’t – I never have done.

What do you feel is the most challenging thing about being a successful chef?

Bringing on chefs, finding young chefs, there aren’t many kids that want to work as much as we do. [Despite all the TV programs about cooking?] Yes, Ready Steady Cook blinkers people about how hard the industry is. Jamie Oliver has done wonders for the industry, I love what he’s done and how he’s trying to get people to think about food. Heston makes it exciting – I enjoy watching him, he makes it fun.

The kids come from school or college, and I sit down with them and their parents and say ‘You’re going to work 16 -17 hours a day, you’re going to spend more time with me than your mum and dad. It’s hard for the the first 5 or 6 years, and if you show promise and you show you’re something special, then it’ll become easier and you’ll climb the ladder faster. It depends on what kind of chef you’re going to be, but you have to give up everything.’ So yes, the challenging aspect is trying to find people to nurture. I don’t care about their CV or where they’ve cooked. If they have ambition and drive and common sense, then I can teach them how to cook. You’ve got to want to do it first.

How important to you is having your Michelin Star?

It’s not the be all and end all [it's a great accolade though isn't it?] Yes it is – it catapults you on. It’s what you dream of, but it’s not what you cook for. I tell chefs ‘Don’t cook for a star, cook for your customers and cook for yourself. Don’t start by putting fancy things on the plate just because it’s controversial or different.’ We didn’t expect it – it took me six or seven years to get the star, and it’s the accumulation of being a chef for 16 or 17 years. As long as you’ve got a busy restaurant – it’s no good having a star if you’re cooking for three or four people, your restaurant has got to be busy. So I cook the things I like to eat, not because it looks nice and everyone’s doing what’s fashionable – it’s food, and people come to your restaurant to eat.

What do you think are the trends this year?

There are two trends – everyone’s going back to cooking, not using foams and gases and jellies. We’ve stopped using all the gimmicks here. You certainly want to try all the fashionable ideas, but you can get a bit lost – when you look at your menu and every dish has got a jelly on it, or a foam. I think everyone’s coming back to cooking – let’s braise it properly, let’s roast it properly, let’s use the best ingredients.

The other trend at the top end, what the two or three stars are doing the Noma [the restaurant Noma - awarded the best restaurant in the world] It’s packed out, left, right and centre. If you’re cooking fish, then you use the ingredients the fish is surrounded by. If you’re cooking meat, you use ingredients that the meat is surrounded by – herbs that are growing around that area. So it’s very technical. [I must remember that when I'm doing my spag bol later on] [Laughs.]

What has been your most memorable booking and why?

We have  a lot. But probably when I cooked for my mum for the first time. I’d been here four or five years, and she’d never eaten in any restaurant I’d ever worked in. That was one of the most nerve wracking things I’ve ever done! First time cooking for my mum, and she’s a very fussy eater. So it was a well done steak and chips, put it in the oven and forget about it [Laughs]
There are a lot of celebrities that come here – the Beckhams, for example, that was a high accolade. Ray Winstone came here by helicopter, so he did it properly! [Laughs] Cooking for chefs! My old bosses, Chris and Geoff Galvin – Geoff eats here once a month now, and for me that’s fantastic that he likes the food that I cook. I worked for Geoff for a long time. Chefs like Paul Gayler, Michel Roux – that was a high honour for me when he came to my restaurant and then came into my kitchen.  Cooking for chefs that have been there and done it is very nerve wracking [It's like me photographing photographers, I know exactly what you mean!] [Laughs.]

What do you think of the wedding industry at the moment and where do you see it in 5 years from now?

Yes, weddings are very important for us – it’s a big part of our business now. Any restaurant that can cater for weddings  can be successful. We’re lucky we have three sites here. Brocket Hall is the main one for weddings, the Golf Club has a wedding on every week. We do a lot of weddings here at Auberge du Lac on Sundays – we did 36 last year. So it doesn’t distract from our clientele. We’re not cancelling people who want to come for dinner, as weddings are booked on the days we’re not open as a restaurant. People love getting married here, and having a fantastic three course meal. As long as they trust us and let us do our job, we can make their day really enjoyable. But you do get the odd bride who’s quite stressful…[Laughs]

What was your most embarrassing moment?

I’ve had a few! When I was younger I was a commis chef, and I remember wheeling a hot trolley into a lift to go upstairs to a private party, and the lift not actually being there, and seeing the trolley fall down the lift-shaft! [Laughs a lot] That was a good one. You even make mistakes even when you’re trying to set an example – everyone’s human. [You're not going to give me any more details?] No no no… [Laughs]

A website and/or blog you like?

I look at Staff Canteen for finding chefs and keeping in touch. I’ve got to know a lot of chefs through that – it’s almost like Facebook for chefs. I look at other restaurants’ web sites to see what they’re doing, looking to see how the site is designed, and how interesting it is – some restaurants have a good gimmick which makes visiting the site an enjoyable experience.  Some are quite hard work!

What talent would you most like to have?

Cook! I’d love to be able to cook [Laughs a lot!]

If you were having fun, what would you be doing?

I’m a massive rugby fan, so I’d be at a rugby match. If I can get to a Wasps game or an England game on a day off, I’m happy. Having a few beers and watching the rugby, that’s good.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

My mum.

Something that is overrated?

Caviar.

Your favourite film of all time?

It’s definitely a mood thing for me – ‘Shawshank Redemption’ is a great film. I love comedy, Dumb and Dumber for example. It depends on the mood.

A book you’ve enjoyed recently?

I’m a big fan of Dan Brown, I’ve just finished The Lost Symbol.

What ambition have you yet to achieve?

Taking a two week holiday! [Laughs] In the summer! [Laughs]

What would you say has been the main key to your success in your business?

Dedication to what I do, but also the support from my family. And the boys in the kitchen, I couldn’t have achieved what I’ve done (the Michelin Star and the three rosettes) without them. There are fourteen of us in the kitchen. About two hundred chefs have passed through my doors over the years, and I keep in touch with a lot of them. Many of them helped me to achieve what I’ve done, and I couldn’t have done it with out them.

What advice do you have for anyone wanting to become professional and do what you do?

Be willing to give up everything – your social life, your friends, your personal life, for the first ten years, if you are serious about being a good chef and achieving what you want to achieve. You have to put everything else on the back burner, that’s what I’ve done – it’s hard, very hard.  I’ve missed watching my nieces and nephews growing up, I don’t see my mum and dad or my three sisters much. But I know they’re very proud of me and what I’ve achieved.

What is your most treasured possession?

Photos of me in Australia for the rugby World Cup in 2003, and a signed shirt from the Wasps boys . Little pictures from my nieces and nephews that they draw for me – I have them on my fridges at work.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

To go round to my sisters, spending time with my six nieces and nephews, playing kitchens with them! [Laughs]

What would your superpower be?

To be invisible. The amount of questions I get all day every day – to be invisible and enjoy a cup of tea for five minutes! [Laughs]

What is the best piece of advice you have been given?

Chris Galvin at the Orrery used to say to me, ‘If you’ve done something that you weren’t sure about, would you serve it to your mum? If the answer is no, then don’t put it on the plate.’

Your favourite indulgence?

Chocolate and a beer!  I’m marathon training at the moment, so there’s not a lot of that going on. Yes, a beer on a day off from work, and a bit of chocolate, while watching a film.

If you weren’t doing this, what would you be doing?

I used to love playing sports when I was younger. I love watching professional rugby, I used to play rugby for school and county, so I’d love to have played rugby.

Tea or coffee?

Coffee

Cat or dog?

Dog

Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now?

Still cooking at the bloody Auberge du Lac! [Laughs a lot!] Still getting nagged by my girlfriend for not taking enough time off!

If you had one wish…
If I had kids, to be healthy. Not much else.

The Auberge du Lac Restaurant

aubergeevents@brocket-hall.co.uk

Phil’s Facebook Page

Weddings I have shot at The Auberge du Lac include:

Jenni and Iri

Lizzie and Patrick

The Bride, St Albans | Designer Wedding Dresses

Welcome to my latest Big Day Small Talk interview with the fabulous wedding professionals with whom I have the pleasure to work. This time it’s Polly Parkin, owner of The Bride, a beautiful bridal shop here in sunny St Albans specialising in designer wedding dresses.

Tell us a little bit about yourself – where are you from?
Well, I was born and bred in St Albans. I went to St Albans Girls school, and went off to Brighton University for my degree (my daughter’s there!) [Did you enjoy it?] I loved it – I did history of design, and I had a great time there. I then got a job as a trainee buyer at Next in Leicester, lived there for a few years, then moved to London and came back to St Albans – it felt like I was coming home.

Do you have a family?
I have a husband, Duane, and 2 children, my son Hector, 11, and Maisie, 9.

Are you in the middle of a project now?
My husband is building the first eco house in St Albans. He has designed it and is overseeing the build. (Duane Parkin www.livingspace3.co.uk)

Are you conscious of being eco friendly in your business?
Yes, as much as possible, although I am dubious of the amount of recycling done by the waste contractors that collect everything – it all seems to go into the same bins.

How long have you been in the wedding business?
8 years, with one and a half years to restore the building – it was derelict and open to the elements with pigeons in the roof. It is a very beautiful building and we’ve tried to restore it sympathetically and retain the original character.

What is it that you love about your job?
I love seeing these beautiful brides going up the aisle looking the best they possibly can. As soon as they walk through the door here, we will do the absolute best for them, we will give them a dress that fits them like a glove. I really enjoy working with people who may be petite, or really tall, or a little bit different, and we will send them up the aisle looking a million dollars, whoever they are. It’s an absolute pleasure every time. We get lovely feedback from our brides which is so so nice.

What do you feel is the most challenging thing about selling wed dress?
Everybody is so driven by price. I think sadly people have taken their eyes off the service side of retail, which is what we are so good at delivering. They are focussing much more on whether they can get a bit off or rather than actually thinking about a lovely experience with the best possible service, and for the whole thing to be an absolute pleasure. We are selling a promise that you will look amazing on your wedding day, and that’s very valuable. It’s hard not to sound false when you’re trying to convince people of your good service.

What do you think are the trends this year?
Lace, we have Kate Middleton to thank for that – she’s reinforced the trend for lace, definitely long sleeves in lace. There is also a move away from the strapless look towards sleeves and straps. I think so many brides have seen ill-fitting dresses, they’re now wary of strapless styles.

What has been your most memorable booking and why?
There are so many!

What do you think of the wedding industry at the moment and where do you see it in 5 years from now?
I think the next five years are going to be good. Inevitably shops are going , shutting down left right and centre, wedding dress shops too. I think people will have to pull their socks up and make their businesses work as hard as they can. The weaker stockists and labels will disappear. People will expect value for money, but also quality and good design – the want something GOOD!

What was your most embarrassing moment?
We have lots! Well, way back during our first year, someone came to pick up the dress, we stupidly gave them the wrong dress, and they were heading up the M1 before we realised! It never happened again! Systems take many months to organise we are a very slick and fine-tuned machine now! When we first opened we didn’t realise these things could possibly happen!

A website and/or blog you like?
I am an avid follower of all my designers’ web sites, blogs and tweets. It keeps me posted – for example Suzanne Neville is doing something exciting on TV every week at the moment, or with a celebrity, and it’s important for us to be able to say to our brides ‘did you see Tess Daly’s dress?’, or tell them that a celebrity was wearing a Stephanie Allin.

What talent would you most like to have?
I’d love to be able to sew like our seamstress can – it’s an amazing skill, she just has such finesse,

What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My husband of course! And my children! And I do love my work, I have to admit!

Something that is overrated?
Designer days – I used to love them, when designers came to the shop, and spend the day with us. Sadly it’s become a discount day in a lot of shops, rather than a designer day. We don’t have discounts on Designer Days, that isn’t the point – you get to meet the designer, they’ll measure you and offer style and design advice, and you’ll have a lovely experience with them. So it frustrates me that it’s turned into a discount day and people are not interested in meeting the designer. [Surely you should charge more for a designer fitting - it should have a premium on it!] Yes! We’ve got Sassi Holford in on the 4th February, which we’re really looking forward to – she’s lovely, very bubbly and full of energy. She’s elegant, stylish, classic – the brides love her.

Your favourite film of all time?
Raising Arizona. I love art house movies, we go through phases of Japanese films, or Spanish films and we love Campus West over at Welwyn, where there is an amazing International film club.

A book you’ve enjoyed recently?
I’ve been in a book club at Maple School since my son was in reception. We’ve read hundreds of books over the years. I’m currently reading ‘The Help’, which is amazing. Favourite book of all time? Probably ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’, for nostalgic reasons.

What ambition have you yet to achieve?
My ambition I’ve yet to achieve is finding my home. We move around a great deal, my husband and I, we’ve moved sooo many times. My ambition is to have a house that I can stay in. Even ten years would be lovely.

What would you say has been the main key to your success in your business?
We are very thorough here – it’s somebody’s wedding dress, we don’t leave anything to chance. We are on to everything, super organised, and pay attention to every last detail to ensure everything is perfect. Our brides pay a lot of money for a beautiful dress and they should get nothing less than perfection. It is our attention to detail that has made all the difference. We work very hard – I have a fantastic team here, there are eight of us altogether, six in attendance on Saturdays! I have amazing loyalty from my staff, they have all been with me for many years.

What advice do you have for anyone wanting to become professional and do what you do?
Make sure you take on the best supply base you can, because your business is only as good as your dresses. You need to be somewhere where you’ll definitely get footfall, although we are a destination, so not as crucial for us here. And you need a good team with you.

Three tips for brides?
We make sure they have the right silhouette for them, the right neckline is absolutely critical, as that’s the bit every body notices, and trust us that it will fit beautifully. It’s leap of faith sometimes, as all the dresses here are a size 12, so they have to imagine it fitting them perfectly. They need to choose the right fabric, the right neckline and the right silhouette. Some people will suit shiny fabric, some will suit matt fabric – that’s the level of detail we look at here.

What is your most treasured possession?
Difficult question, hmmm, nothing springs to mind. I have many things from my childhood, my Steiff teddy, for example. My husband and I have been together for 25 years now, and we buy classic things and keep them forever. I love all my things!

What is your idea of perfect happiness?
It would be to have a week where I don’t have to think about anything at all. A summer holiday! I can’t imagine going away for two weeks – that would be an absolute dream. I don’t think that’s going to happen in the next decade! That would be my dream, a two week switch-off! (Laughs!)

What would your superpower be?
To be able to cure people – healing.

Is there something you’ve always wanted to try?
(Loooong pause…) [Jumping out of a plane, climbing a mountain, bungee jumping, he says helpfully] NO! I’m not very adventurous. I tried snorkelling and loved it. I’d like to go to the Caribbean, I imagine it’s very beautiful. I’ve no desire to jump out of an aeroplane or anything along those lines, I’m quite cautious actually. I’d love to try some amazing restaurants, I’m a real foodie – every week a new restaurant, that would be great.

What is the best piece of advice you have been given?
We sought a lot of advice from our suppliers when we opened. Sassy Holford advised us to give brides their privacy when trying on dresses. When we designed our dressing areas, we gave each bride a lot of space, and also privacy – no-one wants to be stripped bare in front of everybody, so we offer a lot of discretion. They are very safe in here, there’s a locked door at the front. [There's nothing worse than trying on clothes when someone pokes their head round the curtain and says 'how're you getting on?'] Yes, our brides feel very secure in here, however self-conscious they feel.

Your favourite indulgence?
I love dark chocolate – my son always buys me for birthdays, or Christmas, or any excuse really, a box from Hotel Chocolat

If you weren’t doing this, what would you be doing?
I’d probably still be in retail buying. I still have a lot of friends who buy for big high street names. I also bought for Daisy and Tom in their day, Tim Waterstone’s venture, which I really enjoyed.

Tea or coffee?
Both – tea in the early morning, coffee mid-morning, tea in the afternoon, decaff coffee in the evening.

Cat or dog?
Neither.

Where do you see yourself in 5 years from now?
Hopefully still here – we plan to make this business stand the test of time. We are always adapting and moving forwards constantly so we stay fresh.

If you had one wish…
I wish for a two week holiday!

Thank you so much for taking time out to chat this morning, Polly, it’s been an absolute pleasure.

www.the-bride.co.uk

mydress@the-bride.co.uk